I’ve been noticing a huge trend in my coaching these days.
A trend around granting permission.
To yourself.
I have found myself in this same boat numerous times. Finding myself searching for the permission that really could only come from within. Realizing that I am the only person in my way. I’m the one who has the power to grant myself the permission to do, be, feel, you name it. But what is it about us not being enough that we are always looking outside ourselves to get the go-ahead? The go-ahead to go after our dreams. That yes, you are making the right choice. Yes, you are allowed to feel that way.
So, what is it for you? Where are searching for answers that you could actually answer for yourself?
For this week’s post, I thought it might be kinda cool to give yourself a giant permission slip. Maybe it’s permission to actually not be happy that you’re pregnant again. [gasp!] Maybe it’s permission to not know what you want. Permission to not want to get married. Permission to love what you love. Permission to have a crush on someone you aren’t married to. Permission to be relieved that so-and-so passed away. Permission to not love that person who you think you SHOULD. I use these as extreme examples for a reason. I think one of the areas we get the most hung up on is how we are supposed to feel. Based off of what? Society? Conditioning? How we were raised? What if you just gave yourself the permission to truly honor your own feelings? What would shift?
You are allowed to FEEL whatever you feel. Period.
Now I would be remiss if I didn’t offer up a small disclaimer here: what you DO with those feelings is a completely different thing. You are completely responsible for your actions and please don’t misinterpret my message here. You may feel like killing someone, but that doesn’t mean that you should ACT on it. Nor am I saying go have an affair. But what if you didn’t vote on how you felt? What if you allowed yourself the freedom to truly experience your emotions? Be messy. Crash and burn even. You get my point. What you feel is yours, but how you ACT is a completely different story. So, don’t go actin’ a fool or harm yourself or others because you think you got the green light from me. Not what I’m saying. So be fucking responsible.
I’m talking about the way you are holding yourself back. Where you are searching for approval where you don’t actually need it.
Ok, so let’s get back to the main point. What is it for you? What have you been voting on?
Oh, I should be so grateful for x, y, z…
Oh, I should, should, should…
What if you granted yourself a big-ass permission slip to just be? To feel what you feel?
Alright, so here it is. Your big-ass permission slip. Make a conscious choice right now to give yourself the permission to ________________. Whatever it is for you. Whatever you are hungry for permission for. Print out this bad boy down below and write it out. Print out a ton of them if you want. Whatever. Just stop fucking censoring what you allowed to feel.
And then report back here and tell me where you are granting yourself permission.
You deserve it, my love.
Do it.
Now.
Download:
My Big-Ass Permission Slip – PDF
Right click then Save link as (for Windows)
or Control-click then Download linked file as (for Macs.)
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Ah yes. Permission. We ask for it, long for it, and fear getting it because then we’d have no excuse to NOT do whatever it is we need to do.
LOVE the PDF. I’m totally printing out as many copies as I need.
Today, I give myself permission to feel down if I have to. Sad if I have to. Anti-social if I have to. Because it means I’m in the process of healing from something. It means I’m sorting stuff out so I can let more in. It means that I’m facing my fears head-on and working through them one step at a time.
Thank you for this, Amy. THIS is why you rock.
Mwah!
Get it, Otiti! Thank you so much for swinging by and letting me in on your permissions! Sounds like it was just the permission you were needing! xo
Love, love, LOVE this.
Today, I give myself some overdue permission to just hate my daytime job. Mentally, I know I should feel grateful. I have a job in an economy where so many others can’t find work at all. And I AM thankful. But this ain’t where I want to be, and it’s certainly not where I’d like to stay forever. So yes, I’m giving myself permission to LOATHE work.
BAM. I feel better already.
Whew!!! Lacey! I can hear the relief! Here’s the bonus… it doesn’t for one minute mean that you aren’t grateful! You can be BOTH… unhappy with your job AND so grateful for the role it has played in your life! So glad to hear you are giving yourself that freedom! You deserve it! Whoohoooo!
Can I just copy Lacey’s post above??
I love this idea!! Downloading the PDF PDQ!
Yay! Thanks for stopping by, Lorinda! Hope you enjoy all your new-found permission! xo
Today I give myself the permission to feel down, sad, desperate. I give myself the permission not to be strong, and to tell about my pain.
Nice! Feel what you feel, girl! Then you get to decide what you want to do with it! xo
Today I give permission to not giving a flying fuck about how anyone else is feeling right now. I give permission to think about myself first for a change and not put up with anyone else’s -ish. Damn, that felt good. Thanks Amy!
Lana! Hell yeah!! I love it! How refreshing to actually give yourself the freedom to really put YOU first! And guess what? You deserve it! Thanks so much for sharing!! xo
Yay! I give myself permission to admit to yell it from the rooftops of this safe space, that I am over the top wildly happy that my bauy boss has resigned and in just 38 days I will never have to deal with him again ANSI get to restore my career and my sanity. I give myself permission to say I actually hate him and he has affected me to the point of physical illness. I will soon be free !
Whooooohooooo!!!! Isn’t amazing how good it feels when we actually allow ourselves the freedom to feel what we feel! Get it girl! xo
Today I give myself permission today that I miss my artist self so desperately. That I am terrified, terrified to pick up my sketch book. What I f I can,t what if I never again re connect with that side of myself that is dying and clawing at me. I ignore her voice within me daily. I am here to find a way to love her again, to find her again. Once my art was my only identity . My big ass permission slip is to shout to myself” go get it girl, what is wrong with you?”
Whoohooo! Sounds awesome! My only thought would be to just check in with yourself on if “what’s wrong with you?” feel powerful? Does it make you judge yourself or does it inspire you to take action? I’m not saying one way or the other, just offering you to check in with yourself. For many people when they use language around “why aren’t I different” or “why am I who I am” it can really bring em down. What if you were to say “Go get it, girl! No time is better than the present!” or “You can have whatever you CHOOSE to have!” Or “You will always BE an artist!” Just throwing out ideas! I firmly believe in allowing ourselves to feel whatever we feel and then looking at that feeling and CHOOSING if that is powerful for us or not. Regardless, I am super happy for you that you are granting yourself permission! Rock on, sista!! xo