It is not possible to fail

This is not an article about re-framing your thoughts about “failure”, it’s an article about dis-proving them. So much of what we do in our lives is an exercise in defending against “failure”: at careers, at goals, at parenting, at relationships, at eating, at sleeping, at talking, at being, at just about freakin’ everything!

We are constantly trying to avoid “failing”.
How totally, and utterly, EXHAUSTING.

And it’s all because we believe that it’s possible to fail, we don’t even question that, we just whole-heartedly abide in it, and we set our lives in motion around this painful belief.

Are you ready to let it go?
Are you ready for IT to let YOU go?

I am.
And so, here it is…

8 reasons why it is not possible to fail

  1. “Fail” is just a WORD that you put on something that didn’t work out the way you thought it should. How on earth can you possibly know that that is not precisely the way it was supposed to work out? How can you know for sure that it doesn’t lead to the best possible thing? You can’t. You can’t know that.

  2. “Failing” implies that you know, for absolutely, positively, 100% SURE what is most needed from you in this world, and this life, and when and where and at what time it is needed. The truth is NOBODY knows that. Not from our limited human perspective in the vast and universal grand scheme of things. NOBODY knows that.
  3. What you call a “failure” might be the very stepping stone necessary to your greatest “success” — which therefor makes it NOT a failure at all, but a very “successful” step in bringing you right where you’re meant to be.
  4. This is by far the most important of all of these reasons: A belief in “failure” — at its very core — is a belief that some human lives are worth more than other human lives. It is a belief that some people are more “valuable” than other people. That “successful” people are more valuable than people who don’t “succeed”. It is saying that their lives are not as important, their families, their loves, their EXISTENCE, is somehow of less worth than a “successful persons” life is. That is the very same core belief from which violence and cruelty are born — a belief in separateness, a belief in INEQUALITY. This is the violence you commit against YOURSELF when you believe this thought. And excuse me, but it’s bullshit. The mind is very tricky, and even though we don’t immediately see it, this is the core of what is hiding under the thought of failure.
  5. In order for it to be possible to “fail” you would have had to have seen out into the furthest reaches of the future indefinitely. You would have to have seen HOW IT ALL ENDS in order to know the apparent “failure” was not the very thing that was needed, and NONE OF US have seen that. NONE OF US knows precisely what’s needed, and when. (This may be a bit of a repeat, but it bears repeating from a different angle)
  6. What you call a “success” might quickly turn into a “failure”… given time. 1 week, 1 month, 1 year, all “successes” eventually dissolve and could then be called “failures”. Just as any “failure” could quickly become a “success”, given that same time.
  7. Every apparent “failure” is just a sign saying, “This isn’t it. You’re needed somewhere else.” It’s a time/thing/place/person you are not supposed to be with. If you WERE supposed to be with that, you’d be there — and you’d call it a “success” — but only because that’s the way you THOUGHT it should go, and so it matched your ideas of how things “should be”, and so you call it a “success”. When really, reality and universal intelligence is always going the way it should, wether it matches your ideas of how it should go, or not. When you see this, you see “success” and “failure” are nothing more than words tied to how you think things should go. As if we know what’s absolutely best for us from our limited viewpoint here! How can we know that? We can’t. Not absolutely.
  8. “Failure” is just a word, a LABEL, you attach to yourself in a moment and then freeze yourself into a CONCEPT. A boxed-in and painful concept. Not a person, not a soul, not an integral part of the vast whole of EVERYTHING… you have made yourself into a “failure”, and it’s just a word. It doesn’t mean ANYTHING except what you think it means. It doesn’t mean a thing, until you attach your beliefs about it, your beliefs about how it makes you less valuable, less “worthy”, less important than any other being on the planet, and then it becomes “bad”, and “sad”, and “awful”, in your experience. But it’s not because of the WORD, it’s because of your beliefs. Your painful and very un-true beliefs about that word.

So you see, it’s only possible to fail, if you believe in the concept of “FAILURE”. It’s only possible if you believe that some life is of more value than other life, and some moments are of more value than other moments — and a belief in THAT will be painful every time. Because it goes against the nature of who you ARE.

You are LOVE, my friend. You are UNCONDITIONAL LOVE itself, and every time you carry a belief that puts conditions on that love, it’s going to be painful. And it’s going to keep being painful, until you wake up to it.

Just as it should be.

So embrace that pain as a friend, and let it do its job in shaking you AWAKE to the truth. The truth that NO ONE is of less value than anyone else. What we call “successes” and “failures” are just things going the way they should, one is not better than the other, you just can’t see far enough ahead to know how that ripples out and touches ALL THINGS.

It would break our mind apart to know the reality of the ultimate interconnectedness of things, and we don’t need to know that.

We can just trust, and go BEYOND even trust,
and begin right here, with all the ways we’re supported NOW.

And it’s enough.
It’s ever-so-much-more than enough.


7 Comments

  1. Allyssa says:

    I needed to hear this today. Thank you Sunni. Thank you for your endless wisdom and cheer and positivity <3

    1. Sunni says:

      thank you dearly, Allyssa! We all need this reminder from time to time, for one day the whole notion will be ridiculous to us. ;) In fact, it’s ridiculous right NOW!

  2. Damn! #7 got me… it so, so gets me!

    i love thinking of it that way – both for all the things that didn’t work out in the past that i blame myself for, and for the things that i’m still in that i’m not always sure about. if i’m still here, still in it, there must be something here for me…

    wow, such peace in this!
    thanks love!

    1. Sunni says:

      Thank you, love! Ooh I love hearing what number most resonates! Yes, always something in it for us, isn’t there? We can take any past event and trace it forward, but the stories never “done” so we never really know what’s a failure or success, cause it’s still unfolding! It kind of takes all the ka-pow out of “failure” and “success” and they just become temporary names for things we don’t understand. Like when they discover a new planet that they haven’t come anywhere NEAR to and they call it zebulanosis 1215 – it’s just a way of keeping track of something that’s yet to be understood. Isn’t that fantastic!

  3. Michaela says:

    Thank you Sunni

    Blessings
    Michaela

  4. Sunni says:

    Thank you Michaela!

  5. [...] It Is Not Possible to Fail An interesting look at failure and what (we think) it means. [...]

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