I’ve recently been in many discussions around the topic of self-love and I have seen that many people really struggle with what that concept actually looks like. I think one of the biggest components of self-love is our self-care. Self-care can come in many forms and can start creating the mental awareness you need around YOU BEING IMPORTANT. When you start consciously creating the time to nurture and grow yourself, you miraculously become a better mother, wife, friend, co-worker, sister, and most importantly, you have pride in the person you are. Take a look through the following and see where you can begin showing yourself a bit more importance.
- Change your mind-set. Create a mantra. Develop a new belief. Whatever it looks like, you need to decide RIGHT NOW that you are deserving of the life you want, the time you need, and the care of self you desire. If you follow my work here on Roots, I am a big fan of mantras. (Check out some ideas HERE and HERE.) Find something that will empower you and remind you that you deserve self care. In fact, it’s mandatory. Once you have your new empowering belief/mantra/phrase/whatever, create a structure: put it on your phone screensaver, your computer screensaver, in you planner, on your car, have a jewelry item that reminds you of it, whatever, just be sure to have the reminder around you.
- Treat yourself. Do something once a week that is ONLY about your personal self-care. Not about influencing others. Not about anything other than you simply enjoying yourself. Read. Shop. Eat. Drink. Learn. Pamper. Masturbate. Whatever it is for you that is a treat and feels really empowering… doesn’t matter. All it needs to be is something that feels like a caring gesture towards yourself.
- Value your physical self. This is an area I think we can all take some pride in, in order to boost our self-care. How are you treating your body? Would your body have any idea that you care for it? Would it ever think you are grateful for it? Can you fuel you physical body better? What would be one small step? Cut out something you know doesn’t serve you? Walk around the block? Hell, even park farther from the store in order to get a longer walk in? What about other ways you take care of your physical body? When was the last dental cleaning? Eye exam? Hair cut? Pedicure? How you take care of your physical vessel is very telling with how much you value yourself. Our physical bodies are the only vehicle we can have to move our spirits around on this earth. Take care of it.
- Eliminate toxic people. OMG. Super self-explanatory. Seriously. If there are people in your life who really don’t ever help you be a better person or make you feel guilty for putting yourself first… kick ‘em to the curb. Chances are, whatever you are holding on to in these relationships, is NOT WORTH what it is costing you in self-care.
- Start saying NO. Again, if you follow my rants around here, you’ve heard this one before. I love to say Assertiveness + Kindness = Freedom. You don’t have to be an asshole. Just take a fucking stand for yourself and start saying NO to shit you don’t want to do. You can do it. I promise. And once you get the hang of it, it gets easier, and more and more empowering. Crazy thing… you’ll also start to garnish a shit-ton more respect from others along the way. Bonus.
If you are really at the beginning when it comes to self-care, print this post out and take baby steps. Start with only number one. Work on getting your new phrase or mantra. Then practice using it. Believing it. Work on that until you feel more confident. Then move to number two. Set up one date with yourself. This process can be as simple or aggressive as you need it to be. Whatever you do, DO SOMETHING!! Decide RIGHT NOW that you are fucking worth it! And if you have a hard time believing it right now, then believe ME. I know you deserve it. So, until it’s a resounding “FUCK YEAH, AMY! I know I deserve it”, just take my word for it, and get into action. Go.
Oh, and if you want more support around this, I’ve been working on a pretty badass movement to support you. Go HERE to get tons of info and freebies.