Live and be beautiful

Mar 6th, 2012
by Dyamond Robinson-Patlyek.
2 comments

Please note: The title does not say try to live and become beautiful. These are things that already are. You are living. You are beautiful. But it is up to you to own that truth.

Your happiness doesn’t depend on how much money you have.
Your life does not begin once you have that perfect job.
You don’t have to wait until things are in order to live, and be happy now.

I feel like we are taught that we need things to be happy. We have come to know happiness and life to be something outside of ourselves and that’s just not true. So so not true.

You have a choice. The power is absolutely 100% in your hands.

And I know I say the choice is yours and I can hear a voice inside saying, “Yeah Dyamond sure the choice is mine, but it’s not that easy.” And to that I say… So?

When I say the choice is ours I don’t mean that we are performing some magic trick and PRESTO! Everything is shiny and confetti and celebration automatically begins! Weee!!! I mean that’s awesome, but not really what I’m getting at here.

To make the decision to live and be beautiful at this moment can take some work. And it will take some work because there will be resistance. There just will be. It’s like breaking a bad habit you know? It doesn’t happen overnight and it’s not easy, but the payoff is worth it.

In order to begin that soul work you have to make the decision to do it. You have to know that you can live fully, breathe fully, right now. You have to believe in yourself. I can believe in you (I truly do) all I want but if you don’t see that truth, change will not happen. You have to understand that you are creating your story, and with that knowledge you can change it.

You can begin this journey in small steps. Small steps are powerful steps. You can begin by smiling at yourself in the mirror everyday and say, “I am beautiful” with sleep lines on your face, wild exotic hair, yummy cheese smelling breath and all. You can choose to start your day with gratitude, shedding light on everything that is great in your world no matter how tiny. You can choose to focus on what you have accomplished rather than what you haven’t done yet. It’s all a choice. No one is making you choose a destructive way of thinking.

It’s much easier to blame someone else for our downfall isn’t it? I’m not saying that other people have never wronged us and I’m not saying that those who have wronged us should be ignored or that the person should not be acknowledged. However, by shifting the perspective from someone else to ourselves, we gain so much more. It is worth getting through that fear.

When we realize the choice is our own we gain or rather realize we already have massive amounts of power. It’s powerful knowing our lives are in our hands. And with that inner knowledge and this new found power, we have the strength to stand up for what we believe in, and approach people who may have wronged us. How many of us have issues unsettled because we gave our power to someone else?

Take it back. Take it all back. Seriously right now while you are reading this. Make that decision. You really can.

You are alive, you are living, and breathing, now. You are beautiful right now. You exude beauty. Light bursts from your core at this moment.

Beautiful is not something you become, it’s something you are and I’m going to leave it at that. Whether you believe it or not is your choice.

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Thank you so much for taking this journey with me, and allowing me to be with you this winter. It truly means a lot to me. Interacting with all of you and sharing stories from my heart has been an invaluable experience. I’ll still be over at my blog Dyamond in the Rough, so I hope you’ll stop by and say hi! Thank you for being all that you are. You are absolutely amazing and I love you.

A reminder on the wisdom within

Feb 21st, 2012
by Dyamond Robinson-Patlyek.
6 comments
Wisdom - Seeds of Light by h.koppdelaney
Wisdom – Seeds of Light, originally uploaded by h.koppdelaney

There are a lot of beautiful souls sharing their knowledge everywhere. They blog, make e-courses, write books, do talks, they spread their gifts in a lot of different ways. These wonderful people are here to help us and guide us to see things a little clearer. They help us to love ourselves more, they teach us how to start our own businesses, they lead us have better eating patterns- anything we are lacking, we are sure to find someone that would be happy to help.

Guides are people who sort of show us the way. They help us get on the right track with whatever we would like to accomplish. Sometimes we stretch that truth a little bit. Sometimes we feel that if we do not do exactly what that person says, then whatever we are doing is wrong. We become so entangled in our teachers words of wisdom that we forget that we have words of wisdom of our own.

Have you done that before? I know I have. I know that there have been times of darkness for me where I felt like I just needed someone’s help. That’s not bad at all. Help is always here for us. The problem came when I stopped listening to my heart, and threw out any wisdom it was trying to tell me. Not good. I have learned all that I have learned in my life by letting others help me and also from my own experiences. Both mixed together. Sometimes we get so caught up in what an expert says that we forget that their suggestions are not golden truths. We forget that we are the experts of our own lives.

Resources should be used as guides to help us find our own truth. We still must pave your own path. Listen to your words. Sometimes how we feel may go against what one of our teachers may have told us, or sometimes we may feel that we need to do other things in addition to what our teacher has told us and that doesn’t mean we are wrong. We are allowed to think for ourselves. We are allowed to say “Hey, maybe this works for other people, but I want to do something else.”

Following someone else’s blueprint does not make your true self shine through. Your true self is what we want to shine through in all of what you do. You. Not someone else. Let them be inspiration for your brightness.

I like to gather other people’s opinions together and get their insights on things because people are very wise creatures and we should go to them for guidance. But when I add my own little twist, take the insights I’ve gathered from others, and the truth my heart speaks to me, I do whatever I am doing with my full heart and you can tell the difference.

It’s like cooking (I use cooking as an example because – mmmm food). I wanted to learn how to make alfredo sauce because I love me some alfredo sauce. So I found a yummy recipe and I followed it exactly as written. It was DELICIOUS! I made it a few more times that way but then I began experimenting. I started adding things like artichokes and smoked paprika, and a few peppers and hmmm I think this would taste good with some cinnamon. Now I have my own recipe. I wouldn’t have gotten there without the guidance of someone else’s tasty directions, but my recipe isn’t any less good, it’s more my own. If anything it’s better because you can taste more of my heart in my cooking now.

This is something I needed to remind myself of recently, and I thought you could use the reminder too. It’s good to share our wisdom. And we all have wise words. We all have things that we can share with each other. Let us sit by the fire and share stories of our lives. Let’s listen to each other and gain knowledge from one another. There are teachers all around us and they don’t all have a large fan-base or have written books. Some are much younger than us, some much older. Lets be open to our teachers but in that process let’s not forget that the most influential teacher we have is ourselves.

If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.
-
Katharine Hepburn.

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So what do you do?

Feb 9th, 2012
by Dyamond Robinson-Patlyek.
18 comments
Colours by Camdiluv ♥
Colours, originally uploaded by Camdiluv ♥

I never mention what I do. To anyone. At least I didn’t anyway. Whenever I’m around someone new I would automatically become nervous because I knew that dreaded question was coming.

So what do you do? Tell me more about you.

I would FREAK OUT over this question. All in my head of course. I worried about what my new acquaintances would think about what I did. I thought they would think I was silly. I believed they would just see me as some crazy hippy woman. I didn’t want to be criticized for my beliefs and I definitely didn’t want to be criticized for what I felt I was put on this earth to do.

So I wouldn’t tell them. “I don’t do anything * laugh * I’m just a college kid.” That was always my answer. I don’t do anything. And after talking about my not doing anything I would quickly try to move the conversation far, far, away from me and all that I did not do.

I wasn’t comfortable being myself and a lot of things suffered for that. I was telling the universe that I did nothing. That I was nothing. And with that my creativity fell. I stopped writing as much. I stopped working as hard on my Etsy shop. I didn’t have the desire to make mala beads as much. I slowly began to fade into the background. I had not yet realized what was going on, and I began to feel like people hated my work because they weren’t looking at it anymore.

It took a while for me to connect my lack of confidence in myself with my lack of drive and determination. It wasn’t until I began talking to Sandi that I realized I did this to myself. I have control of my success and I gave that control away.

In knowing that I gave away control of my success I saw the light at the end of the tunnel. I knew then that if I gave away that control I could get that control back. The way the path is paved is by the steps that I alone take.

I decided to get behind the wheel again. I set a schedule for working on new pieces, and I finally set a blogging schedule for myself. I’ve been writing down every single idea for new products and have been slowly fleshing them out. I constantly remind myself that this is my path and if I put in the work, continue to believe in myself, and let others help me, there is no reason why my dreams cannot become a reality.

So what happens when people ask me that dreaded question now?
I tell them what I do.

I am an artist. I create mala beads that bring joy to people’s lives. I use my writing as a way to help people open up their hearts and feel more awesome about who they are. And I’m also in college learning all about studying people. I hope to use the skills I learn in to go out and help change our communities. I hope to people get people off the streets, lessen neighborhood crime, and I want to go to women’s shelters and help them feel empowered again so that they get back on their feet.

I am a big dreamer, but dreaming big is part of who I am.

What about you?

Your journey is our journey

Jan 26th, 2012
by Dyamond Robinson-Patlyek.
8 comments
Holding Hands Candle Holder by rockmixer
Holding Hands Candle Holder, originally uploaded by rockmixer

I only know what I know because I sat on the backs of giants.
-
Isaac Newton

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I had a lot of guy friends growing up. I just got along better with guys than girls for some reason. Their girlfriends always HATED me! They always had this idea in their heads that I was out to get their man when in actual reality I just wanted to hang out with my friends.

In our world there is always this mentality of competition. We are always sizing each other up. Always tearing each other down. Instead of celebrating each other’s success we silently wish we had what they have. When we start our businesses or want to get ahead at our jobs we sometimes think of people as resources instead of valuable contributors to our lives.

I’ve had people take my friendship for granted on numerous occasions. I was there when they needed someone to vent to and hear words of love and encouragement, but as soon as they accomplished their goals I was nothing but a name in a cell phone.

There’s a reason why having a cut-throat mentality just leads to misery and more struggles.

We weren’t designed to do things alone. We were designed to work together. To lift each other up. We were born into this world already connected to everything that is. Why in the world would going against that lead to success?

Think about it: Even our bad experiences have lead to growth. And even those experiences usually involve others in some way. That just proves even more that we need each other.

So let’s willingly go to each other for assistance. And give that assistance back in return. Let’s remind ourselves that not everyone is out to get us. There are people out there that would love to see us succeed!

Remember there is an unlimited amount of success to be had in this world. Just like there is an unlimited amount of love we can give to everyone.

If something brilliant happens in the world of someone you know, congratulate him or her. Celebrate as if it were happening to you. Life should be one big celebration.

Don’t look at people in the same field as you are as competition. Become their friend. Share strategies. Swap resources. Be there for one another when times are hard and when times are grand.

When you reach your goals, don’t forget the ones that helped you get there. If you stepped on someone to get to where you need to go, help them up and let them sit on your shoulders for a change.

Going against this innate structure of connectedness leaves us feeling like we’re always being judged, very stressed out and filled with fear.

It feels good to live in a world of collaboration, unity and celebration.

Sounds like a much better choice doesn’t it? And the good thing about it is you don’t have to get there alone.

The color of beauty

Jan 10th, 2012
by Dyamond Robinson-Patlyek.
10 comments
natural hairstyle by GazingGirl
natural hairstyle, originally uploaded by GazingGirl

My little brother use to constantly ask if I was adopted.
My mother would always joke and say yes I was.

I was always a strange one in my family’s eyes but that isn’t quite the reason why that joke was made.

It was because I am dark-skinned.

I still remember the boy I had a crush on turning me down because I was too dark.

I remember all the boys drooling over the lighter skinned girls with their long hair.

And there I was awkwardly built, funny looking clothes, and dark skinned.

I use to imagine being lighter. All the images of myself when I’d make up stories would be of a girl with a lighter skin tone and beautiful long hair.

I’m 23 now and I’m just kind of getting use to the skin I’m in. I mean why not? It’s the only skin I have.

But that’s not the only reason to love it.

This is my skin. God thought that it would suit me best. And I couldn’t imagine my skin now without its dark tone. It’s a nice dark brown, with beautiful yellow undertones.

What does skin do?
Why do we have skin?

Think about the functions of the skin.

Is that not reason enough to love it?

Our skin is an organ. It keeps us protected. Every moment there are layers dying and new ones taking its place. It is constantly rebuilding and keeping itself in tiptop shape just so it can protect me.

When it comes to feeling comfortable with my body, I feel that going back to basics is the method that works best for me. Sometimes words get in the way. Our ego can get the best of us.

I find that when I focus on the basics a few things happen:

  1. My space gets filled with so much love and gratitude for all the things my body does that I wouldn’t even dare think bad thoughts about it.

  2. My ego doesn’t have a chance to step in and bring me back towards self-hate.
  3. I have no want or need to compare myself to anyone, because I only make space for love in my heart. I am happy that people’s bodies take care of them like mine takes care of me.

So this story ends well due to the fact that I am learning to love my dark skin.

But I am heartbroken because there can be such a separation between the light-skinned and dark-skinned people in our communities. There’s still this idea that one skin color is better than the other.

My sister is dark as well. Her skin is beautiful! She’s still very young, but she still won’t even admit that she has dark skin. She’s ashamed of it and that just breaks my heart because she’s a beautiful young girl and she should feel that way. I don’t want her growing up hating the way she was made.

One of the first compliments on my skin tone was from a white woman. At first I thought she was kidding, but she continued to boast about how beautiful my skin tone was. But at the end of that compliment, she turned a dagger on herself. Meaning she began to talk about how bland her skin was. She said it was boring, too fleshy and dead looking. But her skin was just as beautiful as she thought mine to be. Just in a different way.

Different is good. Diversity is beautiful. Everyone seems to want something that they don’t have and that needs to be fixed.

Combat self-hate with Self-Care.

Instead of letting negativity eat away at my spirit, I put my focus into caring for my skin. I drink lots of water so that I stay hydrated (still working on that). I make sure that it is properly moisturized. I do my best to protect it from the sun and from drying out from the cold air. Self-care has been the medicine to my thoughts about my skin, and I know my skin is thanking me for that.

Dear one be comfortable in the skin you are in. No matter what shade you are. We were made to be different. That is our nature. We are all different manifestations of the universe. We are all brilliantly beautiful just the way we are.

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